ARE YOU LIVING THE LIFE WRONG? LEARN THE BEST WAY TO LIVE.
Updated: May 23
You been living the way its been taught to you through your own experiences and through seeing others. There are so many factors which influences the way we live, feel, decide and do things. Why do you feel your reaction to a simple thing is completely different from another person. And I m not even talking about a total stranger from different a continent, even your twin brother or sister or maybe your father or mother, though they are the reason you are in this world.
Furthermore, all your reactions are based on your identities and memories. Means they are highly relative but not absolute. By identities I mean your culture, your country, your family, all the things you attach to or feel connected to which influence your decision making. For eg you might love a certain type of meat while other community might just completely avoid it, just a small example, but you get the idea. Also if you want to know the rightful way of living, then its a living which is highly motivated by doing things based on action rather than reaction. Once you start acting on stuff you will completely release yourself from all kind of bondages of memory and identities. That is called living with awareness, living while watching and in absoluteness or present moment.
And when you live in present, you will realize there is no right or wrong or good or bad, its just relative and right living is by watching and acting not by reacting.
Lets learn more about Awareness:
We all receive information through 6 sense doors, eyes, ears, nose, tongue, touch and mind. Anything or everything which comes in contact with these sense doors are called inputs, these inputs they produce sensations on our body and get converted into different perceptions based on how pleasant or unpleasant these sensations are. Now based on these perceptions or feelings we make judgments, which leads to attachments and brings expectations, desires and needs.
In our life we make lots and lots of attachments, this could be attachments to ideas, beliefs, certain feelings etc.. But these attachments come with big baggage which is responsible for all of our sufferings or the problems we face in our life and the issues we create among us or around others. In my own experience I found that most of my sufferings came from my inability to accept the change, attaching to one particular set of mindset, fighting with my own feelings arising due to fearful thoughts, less awareness of how life is a bundle of good and bad, plus getting affected by others point of view too easily and not being able to let things go easily.
This seems to be an issue with most of us, instead of being flexible and accepting of what life brings, we all retaliate and run away from most of the unpleasant sensations and emotions. We need to understand we can't control anything apart from us. There are so many variables which are in no one's hand and they play 99% of the role in any particular outcome we would like to achieve. Learn why and how to observe your thoughts, click here.
But when we bring attachments to particular types of mindsets, beliefs and ideas we are doing nothing but inviting these sufferings upon us. And the amazing thing is, we are constantly making so much in our thoughts that we are not even aware of what kind attachments we have made and how deep they are affecting us. You will be surprised to read that we humans even get attached to negative ideas like I'm very lonely, I can't talk to others, I'm useless and I don't deserve this happiness as we keep on thinking the same thought instead of letting them go. All this happens because we are unaware of our actions, our thoughts and what we are doing at any given time of day just living in an auto thinking mode about the past and future.
What are we unaware of:
1. Life is impermanent, everything changes: We all know this, but still do everything which goes against this law.
2. This body will also pass away one day.
3. We can only take charge of ourselves, we can't control everything.
4. The other person who is hurting you is also not AWARE same as us, just living unconsciously.
5. We are not our thoughts, we make them. They can be ours but they are not us.
6. Good actions bring good Karma and good karma brings good outcomes.
7. Life is like a coin with 2 sides, good and bad. And both sides make it whole, and ultimately 100% of happiness comes with both sides combined, else it's just 50%.
8. We always have a power of choice at every moment with every decision we make. 9. We are very reactive to each and everything around us, instead of more observing and just knowing.
10. We make both negative and positive attachments.
11. Ignorance plays a big role in our decisions making and our actions are mostly influenced by anger and greed.
What happens with Unawareness.
Unawareness leads us to make attachments, makes us less flexible, more controlling, prone to nonacceptance and fear, highly reactive to outcomes, which in turn start bringing issues to the way we live this life. Overall we build up an ocean of expectations in our life and these expectations, desires then lead to disappointments, pain, sufferings, anxieties, doubts and emotional fluctuations.
Lets understand with an example:
Since our birth we have been taught there are 2 things, one makes you feel pleasant and one makes you unpleasant. Plus look for happiness and stay away from sadness, means always be looking for pleasant sensations as that will make you happy. So we look for only happiness, also we are attached to the idea of how an output should appear and how we will receive the happiness from that output.
We desperately look for the ways for all our expectations and desires to come true unaware of the fact that there are so many things which are outside of us. We expect from others, we expect from situations, make attachments to particular kinds of feelings and beliefs and this becomes the reason for all sufferings, depressions, anxieties and panics.
What to Understand:
1. We make thoughts: Why are we not our thoughts? If you can stop thinking, change your thoughts and jump from one thought to another. Then it means you are making them, but they are not you. They can be yours, but you are not them. So if it comes to your mind that I'm not in mood, I can do this, I want to give up, can't handle it then you are giving up to your thoughts actually. But in reality you can change it very well to different outcomes. You are not your thoughts.
2. We are not our thoughts: We think in circles and only think what we have already gathered, seen or experienced. How can we be something, which we have just gathered plus we can switch on, off and divert at will.
3. Thoughts and Body are highly Interconnected: Whatever we think we feel on our body. Thoughts jump from here to there much faster, but feelings take time to detach. We are just suffering our feelings, which are generated by the thoughts, thoughts which we produce. Means we have the power to think good, change our feelings and reduce our anxieties and stresses.
4. We also need to respect that the universe, events, people, situations they all have their independent way of happening. Everything depends on so many factors and which are mostly in no one's control, but when we attach to these feelings what we are doing is trying to control these factors and that's why we face disappointment, hurt and pain.
5. A life free from trouble, emotional overwhelms, full of peace and happiness is living with full awareness, acceptance to change, flexibility in idea and strong letting go of power.
Even the richest and most blessed people in the world go through cycles of ups and downs, but the most successful are the ones who are accepting of these ups and downs and aware of their power and aware of the reality of life. Like every coin has two sides and one sided coin has no value, the same way life has two sides.
Some things and events will happen as per our desire and some will happen again, but that's what life is, it has two sides. But we don't appreciate that, we just attach to one side and are scared of the other, which is what we need to change. Don't mistake pleasure with happiness, happiness comes when we are unaffected by either good or bad. Hopefully this answers the question of what is the best way to live, which is living with awareness. As only when you are aware, you can do what is right by you and others, else its all just a huge drama.
Calm Mind Power
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