Anxiety and Depressive Thoughts never going away.
Updated: Aug 4
Buddha" Hope is one thing bigger than Fear".
A Coin has only value when it is 2 sided, head and tail, one sided coin can't buy anything and has no value. Same way life is only complete when it is whole, by whole I mean there will be nervousness, sadness, fear, anger and greed as there is happiness, peace, goodness, compassion and love. We only know the true value of one side when other is present, as you will only be certain about the head when you can see the tail.
Important question is how we take things and react to them? This is what we are ignorant about, which in turn makes our life problematic. For eg. If you compare a flower with great aroma and looks with another flower with no smell and looks then obviously our reaction is not optimum and right. Same way the outcomes which are not pleasant on our body and mind we just try to run towards which gives us pleasure. but by definition both are outcomes. Our love for one sort of outcome and fear from other is what bringing the trouble. Learn more about what to be aware of and how to raise awareness, click here.
There is no harm in looking for happiness, love and peace. But the way we are looking is not right. We are allowed to look, but making judgments while looking is incorrect. The right way is to look without making judgments and attachments. Outcomes which brings disappointments, nervousness, sadness, fear they becomes depressions, anxieties and panics only because we become scared of them and retaliate them and just want outcomes which brings pleasurable sensations. Problem is, this is just half of the reality and that is why we suffer. Living the life in this manner we make biased experiences, now we have this amazing ability to make memory. We keep on storing all in our mental database and eventually this ignorant way of living makes these problems coming back and just haunt us again and again. Even if you feel you have gotten rid of them, still they come back. Learn how not to get carried away with emotions, click here.
A big mistake in itself is ignoring the fact that 99% of things which are happening are out of our control. Means expecting one certain type of outcome from your actions when its probability of happening is just 50% ( Positive 50% and Negative 50%) is a recipe of disaster only. Learn to accept, click here.
What is the right question, is there a way of converting this 50% probability into 100% certainty. Certainty of happiness, pleasure and not get affected by depressions, anxieties and panics . The Answer is a BIG YES, its very much possible. HOW?
Before we discuss the HOW part, let me tell you, we don't even know sometimes we get attached to negative outcomes as well, like loneliness, sadness, anxieties, as we don't know how to accept them and let them go rather we just think about them all the times, get scared of them constantly and keep them close to our heart. Furthermore, as mentioned above now this ability of body to make memory comes into action and we are stuck with bad sensations in a similar way as good sensations. If we do learn how to see things rightly and remove this cloud of ignorance, then these problems will keep on haunting us forever. Learn more about how to reduce your anxiety and panic, click here.
Let's learn the HOW to do Part.
We have learned, that most of the outcomes are not in our control like 99% of them, plus mostly what we do is make attachments, judgments, don't use Power of observance, do not accept negatives as part of life, don't train ourselves on how to see the sensations arising on our body and don't know what is the rightful way of taking feelings & emotions, how to train our mind for letting go of the memories we have made over time while being highly reactive and controlling. That is why we end up in disappointment and anger because we just knowingly running towards probable 50% of pleasure not the 100% of ultimate happiness and peace.
1. Accept: Accept outcomes are not in our control, accept there will be feelings which will not bring pleasant effects, accept the incoming scary emotion as a part of life, accept disappointments and sadness will be there so not being afraid of them or fight their existence, as when you fight those thoughts they lead to depression and anxiety. Accept that we try to control everything around us, accept that things change all the times, everything is impermanent so there is no merits in making attachments, accept that bad sensations are integral part of life and don't be scared of them, accept we react out of ignorance. This acceptance will take lot of pressure off your system, as you will stop this running towards one thing and away from one thing.
2. Let Go: This should be the ultimate mantra of life, which is to let go as soon as possible. Let go of the hurt you been keeping in your heart, because believe me the person or event responsible for this hurt is not even aware or care of what he has done. Let go of the pleasure you obtain from making attachments, because in bigger picture, it is just making you handicap and addicted, let go of your attachment towards negative thoughts also, drop all the thoughts which bring fear, leads to depression & anxiety. Just let go of the fear it brings along with them and take them as part of life. See how we make a simple worry to overworry, click here.
3. Observe the sensations: We make perceptions based on the sensations we receive on our sense doors. Eyes, Ears, Nose,Tongue, Body and Mind, so whatever input comes on these sense doors, they make a contact with us in terms seeing, hearing, smell, taste, touch and thoughts. Based on this contact we generate sensations, which then in turn results in pleasant or unpleasant feelings and that is what is responsible for us making attachments. We can stop this at the very beginning by just introducing one small skill which is called Observance.
Means when the touch happens and sensations gets produced, just observe that step and stop the formation of judgement right there. Increase your observance power and the best way to do the same is by increasing your listening skills. So listen more and talk less, also be mindfulness in everything you do this will definitely help you take things the way they are and won't scare you. Learn more about how to be mindful, click here.
4. Meditation: Want to learn more about your mind and thoughts, then start doing meditation. So many ways to do meditation, like sitting, walking or lying meditation. Follow guided meditation sessions available widely on YouTube and other places.
5. Compassion and Kindness: If you love yourself, than first and foremost thing, to do is forgive others and forgive yourself. What's done is done, increase the strength of your morality and stay away from bad actions and bad intentions. Don't repeat the mistakes or go down the path of bad action. Live a life of discipline, ethics and morality. This will bring strength in your heart, so forgive more and be more kind, compassionate plus less prone to problems of sadness and depressions.
I just want to say, problems are integral part of life, we cannot escape from them. There will be days when you will be highly anxious, depressive or surrounded by disastrous thoughts. But if you learn your mind and remove that cloud of ignorance then sky is limit for your happiness. So 100% or ultimate happiness is living normally, peacefully and calmly even in the presence of depression, happiness no matter whatever the outcome is , without getting affected by them.
Anxiety or depressive thoughts might come back or might not, but with right training using above mentioned points, mind can be made strong, strong enough which doesn't get much affected by these thoughts.
Calm Mind Power
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